Do Characters in Erotic Fiction Have Too Many Orgasm?

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By A. C. Rose

Since so many of the heroes and heroines in our favorite romance books have so many orgasms, and since many readers are inspired to take their own orgasmic pleasure while reading, or immediately following a good read (jumping the bones of your spouse, waking your beloved from a deep sleep to have sex, or employing the help of your favorite toy or digit) we recently asked Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D. about the pros and cons of orgasms for real people.

Dr. Ramani is a licensed clinical psychologist, professor of psychology, and author based in California. We love the way she offers practical insights on emotional and sexual issues. She even looks like she could be in a romance novel!

She is all for orgasms, by the way, but says like anything in life, balance is key. While it is fun to read, in real life, you probably would not want to come as much or as often as some of those ladies we read about!

Are orgasms good for our mental and physical health?
Orgasms are great for you – for the obvious and ostensible reason – they feel good, really good. Within the context of a sexual relationship they can be a place of connection and connecting your partner to a pretty damned good experience. And if you are bringing yourself to orgasm–masturbation,using vibrators etc.–then there are also tremendous benefits.

What are some of the special benefits?
Benefits include a sense of vitality, and and a way of staying in touch with your own body. Orgasms can also be a relaxation tool. They can also be a great re-boot. I sometimes even suggest orgasms as a weight loss tool. Since so many people go for cookies as a “pleasure” moment, instead of sticking your hand in the cookie jar, stick it between your legs. Finally, it has also been suggested that orgasms have analgesic properties; and, if you can swing it, an orgasm can take the edge off pain such as a headache.

Are orgasms ever bad for us?
All things require balance. E.g., orgasms are great, but excessive masturbation, to the point that it may be detracting from your sexual life with your own partner, may require exploration and discussion. In addition, preoccupation with orgasms and the like, may also be a distraction from the rest of life.

Can the race to orgasm create pressure for some people?
Some people may have sexual response issues and may not always achieve an orgasm at the end of a sexual encounter, and sadly use that as the singular outcome. Sometimes we don’t get there, but the connectedness of a sexual experience may be a critical part of a human encounter.

Do we tend to make to much of a big deal about orgasms?
Bottom line is: Orgasms are good, and a great and pleasurable part of life. However, just like you may not plan your life around dessert, you probably may not need to plan it around orgasms. We are a culture that is so confused and conflicted about sex, and yet a healthy adult sexuality is an essential part of adult life.

The bottom line: Go ahead and have fun trying to keep up with the orgasmic pleasures of fictional characters, but know that intimacy is the most important part of the experience for most of us.

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