‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Is Good For Your Brain, Says Top Doc Daniel Amen

Unlease the Female Brain

By A. C. Rose

We asked leading brain doctor, Daniel Amen, MD, about the benefits of reading Fifty Shades of Grey. He agrees it good for us!

Dr. Amen is a clinical neuroscientist, psychiatrist, and expert on applying brain imaging science to everyday clinical practice. As founder of the Amen Clinics and bestselling author of 29 books, he is a leading expert on all things about the female brain.

He indicated that the reason we love reading Fifty Shades so much is that it can heighten feel good chemicals in the brain and inspire more sexual activity as home, which in turn helps us feel better!

We were able to pose a couple of question to him about Fifty Shades during a interview about his book, Unleash the Power of the Female Brain: Supercharging Yours for Better Health, Energy, Mood, Focus, and Sex, in which he offers tools and exercises for understanding, optimizing, and harnessing the power of the female brain — including a program for relief from depression. The books was released in paperback last month.

Here’s an excerpt from our interview.

A. C. Rose: Fans seem so happy when they read Fifty Shades of Grey. Do you think it boosts their Serotonin?

Dr. Daniel Amen: It’s not Serotonin, it’s Dopamine. Dopamine is the chemical that is pleasure, surprise, motivation, “OMG,I can’t believe he did that,” or “I can’t believe she’s giving into him.” I think husbands or boyfriends get the benefit because now it helps the women relax.

Is it correct to that that when people are reading fiction books, the brain can’t tell difference between reading it and doing it?

Dr. Amen: Yes. You have to be careful what you read. I think you have to be careful what you read because it becomes part of your DNA. It stimulates people.

You mean Christian Grey gets into your brain? Is that how it works?

Dr. Amen: Happy thoughts. He becomes part of synapses. You’re much more likely to remember something if it’s visual and emotionally intense, good or bad. For that month my wife was reading those three books, I noticed that she was more talkative, more happy, and more edgier, and was very curious.

Does this book alleviate depression in women?

Dr. Amen: I think it’s the trigger that leads to other things that helps alleviate depression in women. Women are more stressed out now because they are doing too much, working full time, managing their husbands, taking care of their kids. Because of that they begin to ignore some of the really important parts of life that have anti-depressant qualities like making love to your husband. I am convinced it has anti-depressant qualities, not just because I’m a guy (I’ve been accused of that). It’s the exercise and the eye contact, touching and closeness. Another treatment for depression is interpersonal psychotherapy, teaching people to get along with other people has anti-depressant qualities.

So it is no surprise that reading the book can improve a readers love life and perhaps your mental health?

Dr. Amen: If you read the book you are tinglier inside and you like your husband more, then you are relieving some of the built-up energy from reading the book on a more regular basis, which has anti-depressant affects.

Does the basic act of reading make you feel like it’s really possible? Like it’s happening to you in real life?

Dr. Amen: It depends on the book. Ken Follett is great about writing about relationships and you find yourself totally immersed and it’s like you are there. This is why you smile and why you laugh–because he’s talented at being able to put you right where the story is… right where the bedroom is… right where the flirtatious woman or guy is.

And many of us feel like we are right there when reading Fifty Shades and other steamy novels!

Unleash the Power of the Female Brain: Supercharging Yours for Better Health, Energy, Mood, Focus, and Sex is packed with great advice for women on how to be healthy, happier, calmer, and to access the power of the female brain. He says some of our natural skills include intuition, empathy, self-control, and the ability to work collaboratively.

Dr. Amen is also the author of the bestselling book The Brain and Love, for more information on his take on the benefits of love, sexual activity, romance, and the brain. Its a really fun book.

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6 Tips For Creating Hot Romance At Home

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By A. C. Rose

There are simple elements to tantric sexuality you can use anytime to bring a little hot romance and intimacy into your home life. Tantra teacher and author Charles Muir suggests these ideas for couples:

1. Eye contact. When you look deeply into someone’s eyes you connect with them intimately and immediately. That technique can help anyone develop immediate rapport in almost any situation, and is especially helpful to connect that way with the one you love (or the one you want to be loving).

2. Ten minute connects. At least once a day, couples should share a hug, touch, embrace or a roll on the bed for ten short minutes. This will help enhance intimacy in relationships and keep couples connected.

3. Takes turns. Partners can switch roles regularly so that initiating sensuality in a relationship is a shared experience. This way, no one has all responsibility, and each partner has a change to give, receive and experiment with what they want.

4. Experiment. Learn what really feels good and pleases your partner by trying different sensual strokes, caresses and techniques.

5. Kiss often. Use your lips to let your partner know how much you care. Alternate styles of softness, speed, pressure and playfulness.

6. Harmonize moods and energies. Lying down together quietly and breathing in unison is one way for couples to get on the same wave length.

Have fun trying these out. Sigh.

Click here to discover more about Tantric Sex and G Spot Orgasms.

Tantric Sex and G-Spot Orgasms

Stephanie Kerns

By A. C. Rose

Erotic romance books may inspire the urge to merge, but ever feel that your actual love life does not quite measured up to the rockets and rainbows, fireworks and shooting stars, of romantic fantasies? You are not alone!

Kinky sex aside, there is another kind of loving that can increase your connection to your honey and your orgasmic pleasure in real life. It’s called “tantric sex.”

The basic premise of the ancient art of tantric sexuality is that couples who practice tantra together share a deeper ability to communicate, a spiritual connection, and an extraordinary expression of erotic love. And here’s the fun part: Tantra is devoted to honoring the female. Although both partners share in loving exploration of sexual pleasures, pleasure for women is one of the primary aims of this kind of sexual play.

Tantric Sex for modern women and men was brought into the twentieth century in The Art of Conscious Loving Seminars taught by Charles Muir and his ex-wife Caroline Muir. Charles is still teaching around the world.

So What Exactly is Tantric Sex?
The word tantra, in Sanskrit, means “expansion.” Relics of tantric rituals date back nearly five millennium. Hindu practitioners of tantric yoga practiced and taught sexual play and sexual union early on in life, yet sex was just one of 65 arts. The other 64 included traditions such as singing, writing and drawing, tattooing, making beds and spreading out carpets and cushions for reclining, and the study of sentences difficult to pronounce.

They also had unusual names for sex organs, which are still used today. For instance, a “lingam” means penis and “yoni” is vagina. And tantric lovers don’t use the word penetrate, rather, they enter. “Permission’ is also a key word and concept.

Seek Your G-Spot and Ye Shall Find
The G spot has long been heralded as the elusive female love spot that truly can send you to new heights of passion. But it’s not a modern day discovery — the ancient teaching of tantric love and sex have been aware of this female pleasure spot for milleniums. They call it the “Sacred Spot.”

For women, one of the first hurdle to jump is not just finding their G-spot, but believing it actually exists! A fair percentage of women and physicians will still say does not exist — but it does, trust me! Others just have a hard time feeling it. To help women access the treasure of pleasure and healing available in that area of the body, Muir teaches sacred spot massage.

It is believed that the sacred spot functions in the genitals similarly to the way the subconscious mind functions in the head — it is the keeper of all your sexual records, your pleasure, your pain, your grief. Memories of old broken hearts, broken hymens, sexual abuse, surgery and health issues, and poor sexual experiences are stored in the spongy area that rest right behind the pubic bone. The sacred spot—which is literally the size of a pea—is located in the upper wall of the vagina. When stimulated, in conjunction or separately from the clitoris, it arouses the female and she is capable of multiple orgasms and that mysterious, most coveted, controversial female ejaculation—known as “amrita” or “divine nectar.”

Graduating to G Spot Orgasms
Sexual desire and response evolve with time, as you learn more about what you like, and your partner, if you have a steady one, figures out more ways to please you. Discovering tantra, or any new practice, is about changing, growing and being exposed to new things. It doesn’t mean what you did before was bad — it’s learning a new skill that will bring pleasure to both you and your sweetheart. To master G-spot orgasms you have to give yourself time to learn and practice.

A G-spot orgasm has some of the same qualities of a clitoral orgasm — the building of excitement, the spreading of tingly feelings, the sense of urgency — yet it grows above and beyond anything previously experienced and expected. Not only does the explosion of pleasure feel like its shooting up toward your throat and moving sideways into the reproductive organs, it also is felt in the thighs and breasts. Most of all, it gives women a great sense of opening up and becoming more expansive!

Click to discover 6 Tantric Tips to Help Create Hot Romance at Home.

‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ Hooked Us With Erotic Triggers

that tie

By A. Charlotte Rose

I have been on the Fifty Shades of Grey beat for over a year and a half. In addition to covering the fun burst erotic expression women experience reading it, I’ve been researching the psychological, sociological, and sexual aspects of what led millions of women to fall in love with the story and characters, especially with Christian Grey.

What it is it that touched such a deep longing in readers? What is the secret sauce that made so many go ga-ga for Mr. Grey?

Over 90 million books have been sold and all three books were on the New York Times Bestseller list for what seemed like forever. While the trilogy follows a romantic fiction formula spiced with eroticism and suspense, it somehow has captured reader’s attention like no other book of its kind. Fifty Shades has opened a new conversation about female sexuality, has restored passion to many relationships, and it has kicked open an exciting new door in publishing for many writers already in the field or those thinking of writing steamy love stories.

In search of insight into what got readers so hooked [me included], I attended an informative lecture by sex therapist Sari Cooper, LCSW. Titled “Fifty Shades of Grey: What You Can Learn about Sex Esteem from the Bestseller,” it was delivered to an audience of psychoanalysts at Washington Square Institute in New York City (tough crowd, by the way). Cooper, a columnist for Psychology Today and an ASECT certified sex therapist, said she was even using the book to help couples. She outlined what she called “the erotic triggers” that are written into the book and said these triggers combined are what kept the heroine, Anastasia Steel (Ana) so stimulated and intrigued, and made the story so irresistible to readers.

“These are the multisensory messages that our bodies receive and that get us turned-on,” she explained. With her permission, here are the top 10 erotic triggers she outlined.

1. Powerful hero. “He is dark, mysterious, and possibly dangerous–a total Alpha male. He’s wild, dangerous, and unpredictable. Being with him is like a rollercoaster ride.”

2. Awakened Heroine. “She is innocent. She is the yin to the yang of Christian Grey. She is a young woman awakened by this man who knows a lot more. “

3. Christian Grey uses all the senses – taste, touch, sight, scent, sound. “For example, Ana is always talking about how he smells and he about her scent. He also consciously uses these different triggers to arouse her.”

4. Music is huge part of it. There are many musical moments in the book that inspire erotic or emotionally charged moments.

5. He appeals to her psychologically. “He sends signals to throw her off-balance, such as his first gift of the collector’s edition of Tess of the d’Urbervilles. He attached a quote from the book that says there may be danger waiting. It creates more intrigue for her and she is intrigued by him.”

6. There is stimulation of all the erogenous zones and multisensory anticipation. “Christian does it with such expertise, and so much foreplay, with plenty of time to get Anastasia ready.”

A. Primary erogenous zones. Genitals and breasts.
B. Secondary erogenous zones: Earlobe, neck.
C. Tertiary erogenous zones: Feet, arms, scalp.

7. BDSM. “The book has opened up the door a crack to things people may not have considered before. In Fifty Shades, Ana has many fears about being hurt, but when she is in the red room of pain she is not just in pain—she is in a state of arousal beyond what she would normally feel. Sexual arousal sometimes involves working with negative emotions such as fear and anxiety. It’s the experience of being on a roller coaster that enhances the state of arousal.”

8. Love. “Ana pushes for ‘more’ than being his submissive and he ‘tries’ because he will do anything to keep her. He’s only had subs [submissive female partners] before, women that he has controlled, and he is pushed to his hard limits by Ana who is demanding more. That’s what people love about the book. They want the romance, the emotional tension. Will it work out for them? They want to know!”

9. The experience of being desired. “This is a huge erotic trigger for women. It’s the experience of being that special someone. There is no one else in his eyes. He only has eyes for her. She is the one he longs for. It combines the erotic with the sensual. Being desired is such a turn on for women.”

10. He’s very loyal. “At first we are not sure if we can trust him. She talks about his ‘stalker tendencies. ‘What wins Ana over, and wins the reader over, is he’s very loyal. And when she needs him, he’s there. I think it works because women can feel the fantasy of having that danger, with the security of having a good relationship.”

Cooper’s analysis made perfect sense to me in both understanding what the character Anastasia experienced and how the readers, too, took that rollercoaster ride into the kinky romance and the psychologically intrigue. The idea that women can experience the fantasy with Ana, yet view it from the safety of their own relationships, also explains the appeal of the books.

The concept of “erotic triggers” can be very helpful in relationships, in general. In Fifty Shades of Grey, here are some of the ways those triggers kept Ana, and the reader, in a state of anticipation:

• Sound: “You are mine,” he whispers, “only mine. Don’t forget it.” His voice is intoxicating, his words heady, seductive.” (Page 119).”

• Sight: “A slow, sexy smile spreads across his lovely face, and I am rendered speechless as my insides melt. He is without a doubt the most beautiful man on the planet, too beautiful for the little people below, too beautiful for me (page 370).”

• Touch and Scent: “He runs the tips of his finger down my cheek. Oh my. His proximity, his delicious Christian smell. We’re supposed to be talking but my heart is pounding, my blood singing as it courses through my body, desire pooling, unfurling… everywhere. Christian bends and runs his nose along my shoulder and up the base of my ear, his fingers slipping into my hair (page 427).”

The reader is constantly barraged with these triggers or cues. Along with a genuine emotional connection between the characters, these are present from the start. Even if some of the writing is corny, the sentiments can set women’s hearts afire because they stimulate the fantasy of the perfect man who is not only gorgeous and rich, but is sexually masterful and desires her pleasure. His virility and her fertility are a turn-on and can help the reader feel young, just reading about their interactions. Sigh.

People have complained about the quality of the writing in Fifty Shades of Grey, but I would argue that E.L. James was masterful in her use of erotic cues, and storytelling that stimulates all the senses. Personally, I am a huge fan of hers for opening the door to a brave new world where women of all ages can enjoy reading – and writing –erotic romances without shame. It’s about time, right?

Was Fifty Shades of Grey the first erotic romance novel you ever read?

This was originally published in my Hot Romance column on The Three Tomatoes.

Do Characters in Erotic Fiction Have Too Many Orgasm?

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By A. C. Rose

Since so many of the heroes and heroines in our favorite romance books have so many orgasms, and since many readers are inspired to take their own orgasmic pleasure while reading, or immediately following a good read (jumping the bones of your spouse, waking your beloved from a deep sleep to have sex, or employing the help of your favorite toy or digit) we recently asked Ramani Durvasula, Ph.D. about the pros and cons of orgasms for real people.

Dr. Ramani is a licensed clinical psychologist, professor of psychology, and author based in California. We love the way she offers practical insights on emotional and sexual issues. She even looks like she could be in a romance novel!

She is all for orgasms, by the way, but says like anything in life, balance is key. While it is fun to read, in real life, you probably would not want to come as much or as often as some of those ladies we read about!

Are orgasms good for our mental and physical health?
Orgasms are great for you – for the obvious and ostensible reason – they feel good, really good. Within the context of a sexual relationship they can be a place of connection and connecting your partner to a pretty damned good experience. And if you are bringing yourself to orgasm–masturbation,using vibrators etc.–then there are also tremendous benefits.

What are some of the special benefits?
Benefits include a sense of vitality, and and a way of staying in touch with your own body. Orgasms can also be a relaxation tool. They can also be a great re-boot. I sometimes even suggest orgasms as a weight loss tool. Since so many people go for cookies as a “pleasure” moment, instead of sticking your hand in the cookie jar, stick it between your legs. Finally, it has also been suggested that orgasms have analgesic properties; and, if you can swing it, an orgasm can take the edge off pain such as a headache.

Are orgasms ever bad for us?
All things require balance. E.g., orgasms are great, but excessive masturbation, to the point that it may be detracting from your sexual life with your own partner, may require exploration and discussion. In addition, preoccupation with orgasms and the like, may also be a distraction from the rest of life.

Can the race to orgasm create pressure for some people?
Some people may have sexual response issues and may not always achieve an orgasm at the end of a sexual encounter, and sadly use that as the singular outcome. Sometimes we don’t get there, but the connectedness of a sexual experience may be a critical part of a human encounter.

Do we tend to make to much of a big deal about orgasms?
Bottom line is: Orgasms are good, and a great and pleasurable part of life. However, just like you may not plan your life around dessert, you probably may not need to plan it around orgasms. We are a culture that is so confused and conflicted about sex, and yet a healthy adult sexuality is an essential part of adult life.

The bottom line: Go ahead and have fun trying to keep up with the orgasmic pleasures of fictional characters, but know that intimacy is the most important part of the experience for most of us.

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Don’t You Just Love Sexy, Beautiful, Shirtless Men?

favorite day dream

If you share an appreciation for hot men without their shirts on, please visit the A. Charlotte Rose Pinterest page.

We are so grateful for these handsome men, willing to take their shirts off, for our viewing pleasure.

They give us inspiration for characters in romance novels, and fuel our fantasies.

Leave yourself enough time to meditate (oogle) and enjoy.

Just click here:
http://www.pinterest.com/acharlotterose/fifty-shades-of-sexy-shirtless-and-beautiful-men/

How Christian Grey Can Help Your Orgasms

could use another orgasm

By A. C. Rose

Ever wonder about the brain chemistry of sexual desire that is at play in Fifty Shades of Grey?

We are all hormonally driven creatures, and Ana and Christian are no exception. It could be that the Big O in Fifty also represents the hormone oxytocin.

Although oxytocin was often thought of as the bonding hormone between mother and child, it exists in both males and females and has also been found to be a hormone that intensifies in the orgasmic experience. Kerstin Uvnas Moberg, M.D., Ph.D. has studied this hormone extensively.

Ana and Christian are constantly having sex, in all three books in the trilogy. Most mortal women would not be able to tolerate the sheer magnitude of it – not without some injury or occasional infection – but Ana is young, nimble, and eager and Christian is a skilled lover. They work it!

Every sexual encounter culminates in one or more orgasms, for both partners, which means the release of oxytocin for these two is off the charts. Hence, those two are in a constant waterfall of oxytocin.

This could explain, in part, why they fell in love with each other so hard and so quickly—they spent so much of their relationship basking in the embrace of each other and, what is affectionately known as “The cuddle hormone.”

It is understandable that we, the readers, went along for that ride with them! Raise your hand if you felt it was YOU in the red room, or if you strongly identified with and desired the kind of pleasure our Ana was experiencing in the book.

In The Oxytocin Factor Dr. Moberg writes. “Studies of human sexual relations have shown that oxytocin levels rise powerfully in the blood of both males and females, and reach maximum concentration with the release of orgasm. Oxytocin may also stimulate the muscle activity related to orgasm in both men and woman (p. 118).”

Oxytocin is responsible for making people feel calm, relaxed, and even sleepy after intercourse. It has been known to make women want to cuddle after lovemaking, and give both partners the feeling that they cherish remaining close and connected in sexual afterglow.

“With oxytocin pulsating through your bloodstream, it seems that this love with last forever,” Moberg writes. “Often at this point, partners speak of how much they mean to each other (p. 119).”

The risk with oxytocin released with orgasms is that it can enhance emotional bonds even for those who are not sure if they are right for each other. But in the long run, “a sold sexual relationship promotes feelings of increased security and decreased anxiety in the mating partners (p. 120).”

Luckily, Ana and Christian found their way–and humped their way–to an enduring love.

One of the benefits of reading Fifty Shades of Grey is it made us horny. Many women reported jumping on hubby. Just goes to show you that increasing orgasmic pleasures with the one you love can enhance that feeling of cherishing each other, for real, not just in fiction.

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